Personal Assessment: Going to Trial
Is a trial really needed to resolve these issues? Is there nothing left to give in on? If so, then I have prepared myself thoroughly by orchestrating the best evidence, and the fullest documentation, in my power. Click here for an article on what to do 100 days before your trial. Have I selected the most appropriate witnesses for my case? Are they people who are interested in helping me or my children because they believe in me, rather than because they are friendly with me? I have found people whose opinions are based on experience with me and/or my spouse, and who do not have an axe of their own to grind.
Am I being as truthful and straightforward as possible? If my spouse is not, how am I dealing with it? I hope I am not becoming consumed with revenge or proving the truth. I am keeping my eye on the big picture, and I am taking steps to end my spouse's ability to distort facts about me by separating our lives in as civilized way as possible.
Am I being motivated by fear? How is it affecting my behavior, in and out of court? I am taking the time to understand my fears, and to put them into proper perspective. I am acting out of a position of strength, not fear. Click here for an article on overcoming the fears of divorce.
Excerpted from Your Divorce Advisor: A Lawyer and a Psychologist Guide You Through the Legal and Emotional Landscape of Divorce (Simon & Schuster/Fireside 2001). For more information:http://www.yourdivorceadvisor.com/.